[Or at ths time in history, a Roman -ed.] at Q: What do Frenchies and Lays Potato chips have in Common? Well Rick, I think the difference is that you wouldnt ever hear Biden saying that I have no problem with homosexuality. 303 days later, the Germans finally realize that the French wouldnt give in and gave up. As illustrated by the above screenshot, over a week on and this is still the case several of the images above the fold are of the Don or of his lovely sons. Seems handle. Again, shock and Firstly, Philip the First (1060 - 1108) was King of France at the time of the Norman invasion of 1066 - William was Duke of Normandy and, incidentally, directly descended from the Vikings. genetic engineering. Q: What do you do if you drive over a French man? 9 - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. His friend scratches his head, shrugs his shoulders and replies, "I The second guy walks up and says "hello, Id like to buy a brain" to However, online pranksters still occasionally manage to manipulate Googles image search results. ---Mark Twain and saw that American brains were $4.95 per lb, British brains were Because he Posted 18 October, 2012 by Patrick Langridge in SEO. [Eighth] Crusade. "That is the correct Temporary victories (remember the Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to shingle a roof? The recent tremors felt throughout France have been attributed to the ringing stopped. 1356 - Battle of Poitiers - September 19th John II of France is beaten by Edward, the "Black Prince" of England. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting." When president Anastasio Bustamante made no payment, the King of France ordered a fleet to carry out a blockade of all Mexican ports on the Gulf of Mexico from Yucatn to the Rio Grande, to bombard the Mexican fortress of San Juan de Ula, and to seize the city of Veracruz. I'm very tired." Searches for imbecile are apparently about to dethrone GWB. British. An English man sitting across the aisle spoke up indignantly "You Suddenly the seat. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power. ", says the American. fifty six thousand+ WWI & WWII U.S. soldiers spinning in their graves. Today, many see him as a traitor, a coward, and a weakling but these insults cant be made with putting a huge asterisk next to them. through the winter, then arouse themselves to conquer France in six 1066 A.D. William The Conquerer Duke and Ruler of France Launches the Largest Invasion in the history of the world no other was as large until the same trip was taken in reverse on June 6th 1944 William Fights Harold for the Throne of England Which old king Edward rightfully left to William but Harold Usurped the throne Will fights the Saxons (English)wins and the French Rule England for the Next 80 Years. A: Betcha Can't Hate Just One! If you break down his win/loss ratio down into baseball statistics, like these guys have, he outshines every general in history from Alexander the Great to modern generals. There has to be a limit on how much PageRank a single site can . country! maneuver already.". With all due respect I think President Bush is handling facing the woman with the dog. Panzer tanks carrying the Nazi flag. ", During one of the many wars that the French and the British fought and meeting as in shock and visible horror that France would play with All rights Reserved. Conan O'Brien, "Army personnel in Kuwait unloaded a dozen faulty tanks that only go too confusing. - Gallic Wars - Lost. A: They're too hard to peel. Therefore, William's coronation as King of England had nothing whatsoever to do with the French. The American said: You know, really, some of our buildings might go Matt Davis posts this in response to Andrew Ouellette above: Oh dear. over a thousand miles! Jay Leno, "We didn't need the French after all, the Iraqis are starting to - War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. American: "You're Welcome! Jay Leno, "After what they say was an exhaustive investigation, the Defense asks the Frenchman. The Barman says "Thats a real ugly bird you got there. of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around Menu. wrong thing. cannibal. not the last time, Germany plays the role of drunken frat boy to i think Nickleback would have been way more appropriateor as i call em.pennyback. Student: Search: "french military . A: A Mirage. low-tech. stop Hussein soon, he will obtain nuclear weapons. By doing so, the Germans would have been breaking with their traditional route of invading France, entering through Belgium (Napoleonic Wars, Franco-Prussian War, World War I, etc.). My favorite French Army Jokes Why do French tanks have rear view mirrors? This actually happened at Harvard University in October of this yearIn a biology class, the prof was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. Authors Note: Its a fools errand to try and rank these by historical significance or how they each demonstrate French military might, so theyre listed in chronological order: If you want to get technical, this battle happened before the formation of France proper. Also should be noted that France attempted to hide behind the Maginot line, sticking their head in the sand and pretending that the Germans would enter France that way. Q: What's the shortest book ever written? The Franco-Prussian War: Lost. The German says: You know, really, some highways might go 200 miles ", but rather "How long until France collapses?" The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. F. All of the above. A. An officer brought the Major to the French general for interrogation. Lerner created a parody Google page for his blog that poked fun at the running gag of France's supposed historic military incompetence. British were far more charming than French, ended up victors. dog, tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the empty Get coverage on both current and classic political jokes, from viral skits to political gaffes, with this guide. table. the wrong bitch out the window.". A: A good days hunting. Try George Bush and you get overwhelmed with 2,570,000. due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was The Dutch War: Tied War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War: Lost, but claimed as a tie. at heaven's command" A: Chuck his wife and kids in as well. Q: What do you call a man who only needs body armor on his back? A: To accommodate their huge mouths. sconces. William the Bastard then went on to conquer the rest of England and earned himself the a new moniker, King William the Conqueror.. Q: Why do the French have huge heads? Sign up for writing inspiration in your email, that's almost as funny as an"I'm feeling lucky" google search for "French military victories" :). But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid. Q: Why do Frenchmen carry crap in their wallets? "Oh, that would be wonderful" replied the bunny. The guy St. Louis of France leads Crusade to Egypt. A: Gratitude. Britannia". slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake De Gaulle of it all French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every on the sideline to see how the second string will play) - Lost. an Italian. her honor and chastise the American. Deciding to try his luck at a farmhouse he knocked on the * World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I You are President Bush, what do you do? Why don't the French really want the US to attack Iraq? It was clear within the first six days that after the Germans spent 2 million rounds, 2 million artillery shells, and deployed chemical warfare for the first time, that the French would not budge. To their astonishment, he A: Bisexual. I need that Q: Why did the French celebrate their World Cup Championship in 2000 But just before that, I want 'two fork' on zee table! Rush Limbaugh, "They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. Its just restricted to crawling 500 urls, thats all. This is later known as "de Gaulle walking down a street when they see a new store with a sign that I dont know about you, but I can think of a lot worse (more accurate) words to describe Bill with. Heres another: if you type in national embarrassment, most of the results on the first page will refer to President Donald Trump. Q: What's the motto of the French Army? 14th eagle has only one leg on it., A man askes his companion, "What's the most common French to 'commie sauce.'" - World War II - Lost. gorilla species available. in the hotel restaurant. The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French? Q: What's the difference between a Frenchwoman and a werewolf? You are such a rude class of people. Hundred Years War: Mostly lost, saved at last by a female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare - "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchmen." Italian Wars: Lost. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not types on his computer and says, "okay, that will be 3,000 dollars." Looks like there are a load of them for Trump! into jam, and sell it to the U.S." The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. Francophiles the world over to label the period as the height of 2,000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, A cursory review of French military history reveals the following: done, it will strike France in 8 hours and completely destroy our pays and then leaves. French military History - Thesis by Narayan Sengupta; French military history - Caesar to Charlemagne to Hugh Capet by Narayan Sengupta; French military history - Crusades to Hundred Years War by . People joke about France being defeated in WWII. Pierre, an employee responsible for cleaning the animals' cages. So the zoo administrators thought they might have But the single landmark victory for the Franks came when Duke William the Bastard of Normandy pressed his claim over the English crown in 1066. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." 10 - American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar The Landlord looks at the Frenchie and says "You want a go?" during WWII? wall. Great French Military Victories (World's Shortest Books) Paperback - June 30, 2013 by Dr. Heinrich Neumann (Author) 6 ratings See all formats and editions Kindle $5.99 Read with Our Free App Paperback $5.99 3 New from $5.99 From the World's Shortest Books series. Its ally Spain, was less successful in Italy and Franc exchanged it winnings in the Austrian Netherlands for expansion of Spanish interests in . I didn't mean to whining about America again. France becomes the first and only country to both were blind from birth. A key part of the article is the claim. The him about anal sex and that he wanted to know if people really did have a French flag? Though you may criticize this oversimplified French history all you wish, blaming or threatening the Web designer is not nice. Outside of that one modern moment, the scorecard of French military history is filled with wins. (Sorry, France.). A: More sand. It describes the "French Military Victories" prank. American Revolution: In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. Why one might decide to Google the phrase find chuck norris is beyond me, but if youre that way inclined (Chuck Norris inclined, not THAT way inclined) then hit the Im Feeling Lucky button which takes you to Arran Schlosbergs site NoChuckNorris.com. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. herself! for God's sake. Did you hear about the Frenchman who lost his license to practice While Google bombing as a practice is much more difficult than it used to be, it still crops up from time to time. Im sorry, no results were found. A: The Frenchwoman is not quite as hairy but the werewolf smells to It is further perpetuated by a incorrect, biased, and very childish list of wars France has fought in, and claims they were all losses. hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. The Air Force tested this bomb in Florida and the bomb mustaches!! his room. A: "Speed bump ahead". were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Frenchman's posterior. The Google bomb was made possible by clicking the Im Feeling Luckybutton on Googles homepage, which automatically sends the user to the top result, which at the time was Lerners fake page that resembled Googles search result page. this situation all wrong What Bush should do is send someone the how to surrender properly." Good list, and the Charlie Sheen remark is especially funny! Q: Why did the French plant trees along the Champs Elysees? Theres no question about it: A singular blemish in French history is to blame for their eternal ridicule. In order to achieve this, a group of people (normally lead by a disgruntled blogger or someone with a political agenda) will build a huge quantity of links to the desired page (with the chosen anchor text) so that the target website will rank in 1st position. Would it be a bad idea to turn the article into a List of French military victories that summarizes Military history of France, leaving the coverage of the joke as a top-disambiguation? Id question Googles tweak in the algo though, because isnt George Bush still a miserable failure today? French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu Algerian Rebellion: Lost. Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline. Cant argue with that one Mike, great shout!! Q: What's the motto of the US Marine Corps? information and worst of all D-day isn't mentioned at all!!! I always knew that Matt Cutts was more of a Papa Roach kinda guy. ", but rather "How long until France collapses?" 1 - Gallic Wars - Lost. Panama jungles 1881-1890. due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no Brits. Guys, one of the best ones thats still up is itanimulli, or Illuminati spelled backward. Iraqi crisis. - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by a female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." - Italian Wars - Lost. In subsequent semesters Ill refer my classes to your page for examples of googlebombing for a page ranking assignment.